I just got a ticket for shitting on a sand dune.
the lady in the checkout infront of me had a case of beer, two 40 oz, and activia...really??i dont' think irregularity is her problem
we watched a tutorial on how to do guidette makeup
she's telling me all about the love triangles of her sims. you tell me how it's going.
i just watched a special on porn, the business isn't doing so good. You may want to wait before you start your career
the guy was wearing a viagra shirt, i knew what i got myself into.
I JUST REALIZED HOW SOFT YOUR TABLE IS! and I also just started rolling
I just put fruit snacks in my sangria instead of real fruit. Its like freshman year all over again..
We couldn't afford sangria freshman year. We're lucky we had fruit snacks..
Last thing I ever expected to say, "Get your finger out of my ear or I will stop sucking your dick."
You are COMPLAINING that the sex was too good. You're not getting any sympathy from me
50% drunk capacity currently
I'm having a funeral for my vibrator. Please be there. I need your dick for support.
Dude this weed has me so paranoid.
Yeah tell me about it I just screamed after I coughed because my own cough scared me.
Is it sad that my idea of a quality foursome would involve one person eating me out while the other two rub my feet?
Remember that time we were together? Yeah, I don't miss that.
Randomize
