worst experience of my life. her nipples were sick. kinda like a venn diagram
Covered in glitter and dick. 2010 feels a lot like 2009.
I hate nights where "I found my underwear" can be considered a victory.
you kept saying 'its nothing a six pack wont fix' as they loaded you into the ambulance.
And it just wouldn't be a Thursday night without me having to cuss out a foreigner. The streak continues.
Pros and cons of selling your underwear to a guy on craigslist. Go.
Come down off the roof.
I told him he could fuck me once he could grow a beard. Never expected seeing him ten years later with a goatee and a great memory...
You said you were uncomfortable with your body and then you started making whale noises
You have ruined sex with him for me. Now all I think is "boy scout" and I want to go home
Dude he took a shit in the lake and it just floated around and lingered near our boat for 2 hours. I fucking hate that kid
So my roommate just came out of the shower with a dude...guess that answers all questions as to whether or not he's gay
I wanted one last NYC adventure and I got it. Now I just have to figure out a polite way to wake up the pantless former stripper illegal Russian immigrant street violinist chick currently in a vodka coma in my bed.
And on a positive note i found a list that i made in 3rd grade titled "what to do if you want a guy to like you"
If you can't trust the person at the taco cabana drive thru, who can you trust?!
he is sitting in the driveway by himself laughing at nothing, idk what to do
Randomize
