I'm not to broken up about it. Our relationship was worse than a coldplay song.
so stoned i ashed in my jack and coke like 4 times. drinking it anyway
PS: the photo I uploaded for this internship site is the same one i used for my fake ID. I like to keep it classy.
You NEED to get fingered by a violinist. He used his left hand and make me cum, he's RIGHT handed.
I wish orgasms lasted as long as the pain from rug burn
She's been divorced three times and use to raise cock fighters. Of course I'm interested in her
so he woke up after being passed out and yelled that he had brought back moon rocks for everybody...
Even though we had just had to physically take her off of someones lawn she was peeing on when they came outside, she still insisted on walking unassisted the rest of the way home. It was dignity meets shit show.
I was trying to be an adult about it and simply deal with the situation, but a bowl seemed much more comforting.
He barged in the room with no shirt on, all fucking ripped with a half keg under one arm. Sara now calls him Bronan the Beerbarian
Just let me take your liver out and beat it with a meat tenderizer for you..
Vacuum the place before you go out of town there are random glitter cocks everywhere
Also I’m on 3%. Just Incase.. I miss you and I love you and you’re my everything and I’m getting drunk.
I woke up with my my shoes on and pants half way off and missing 60 dollars. Please please please tell me you saw me last night.
Dude, Kevin called the cops on the cops.
Randomize
