I'm pretty sure my roommate has taken plan B more times than i've had sex. Not sure how that makes me feel.
you tried to do a keg stand and ended up flipping over it and onto the table
how convenient is it that the kid i'm fucking lives right next to planned parenthood?
I say that when we get our grades back we're making a drinking game out of it.
It was so good the neighbors even had a cigarette.
I don't know. I woke up in the back of a cab in a drive thru line at whataburger with police lights flashing and my friend yelling" you didn't have to sell us out phil!" to the cab driver.
in literally every picture i'm wearing less and less of my costume.
Now I don't feel so bad about telling everyone that he's 23 and needs Viagra. It's her problem now
I'm on this new diet called "I have 10$ till next Friday, I have rice
Dad had me doing shots of chocolate mint Everclear last night. I've never felt closer to him.
Ugh. Lets go crawl into a dairy-gluten-chlamydia free hole somewheres.
Did I really just send a work email with cum instead of come? feck me
Molly was fun. I was in a captain planet onesie in Wal-Mart talking to everyone haha
whose shirt was i wearing?
his little sister's
what was she wearing
a feather boa and 6 inch heels
Funniest thing happened to Chloe! She talked the bf into a mmf threesome, and he loudly and enthusiastically discovered he was gay during it. Whole dorm literally heard it happen.Well funny for me. Chloe not so much.
Randomize
