yeah so this exboyfriend of yours reckons you're still together and he punched me in the face cos i slept with you last week. you might wanna have a word with him or at a minimum change your facebook status.
you puked in the cab and all over yourself and tried to convince the cabby it was there already when he got upset... then you puked again. not too convincing are you
the lady in the checkout infront of me had a case of beer, two 40 oz, and activia...really??i dont' think irregularity is her problem
the only muscles i have these days is kegels
Never get a handjob from a girl who gives deep tissue massages.
i think i pulled off the nice guy thing too well. it just backfired later on when she thought i was actually nice.
He invited you over for Super Sexy Saturday and Cosmos... I'm pretty sure that's gay
She was like the Rudy of blow jobs... SO much effort into it
Dude, had to, it's Canada Day, I fucked her for Canada. Seriously, I put my Canadian flag on my bed and fucked her on it.
I'm venturing to your corner of this sin house in t minus 2 minutes.
I went to a community college and majored in Bad Decisions. I'm not exactly a chick magnet.
are you putting in a lot of effort today like appearance wise
I am taking my rightful place as emperor of the undead appearance wise
I just called my boyfriend "Dad"... Awkward
I just revenge puked in his shoes. This is gonna be a fun night :)
He was talking about his friends deceased ferret and I still managed to orgasm.
Now THAT is dedication!
Randomize
