It's cold our but I feel like a very blazed penguin
So they discontinued the hummer... Now people will have to go door to door to let others know they're assholes
I will never try to masturbate with americas funniest home videos playing in the background ever again
then out of nowhere we heard a voice yell "Fuck that pussy!"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am currently listening to someone take a shit. I hate the hole in the ceiling.
And I think short bridesmaids dresses are the best idea especially for bathroom sex
Where are you? I hear fireworks and you've gone missing. I'm sure that is not coincidence.
I'm sports announcer narrating myself making a sandwich. Your weed wins.
Your roommate from freshman year just had a baby. I think you're winning. Hooray for fifth year seniors!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Could you imagine living in a city where bartenders are available by 1:30 AM
I'd have like 4 kids by now and at least one std
Do I get bonus points if I get lockjaw after a cosmic blowjob?
I'm debating a nap but also debating breaking into the liquor cabinet
I need more than 2 fuckable people this is an outrage
got laid for being an eagle scout again. 4 more and ill have all my merit badges.
Can I use your boat
Also, what’s the deal with international water? Do they have signs out there like a city does or do I need a map?
WTH is going on? It’s the middle of the night
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