It must have been true love
I don't call true love eating a bag of doritos and then going down on each other
So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
I vaguely remember telling people they were not trash cans
i cant be the least bit upset about his new gf cause all i think is that she has to put things in his ass
She just said she finds Tyler Perry funny... this is not going to work.
All I remember was the chick screaming "don't hookup with him! His dick's the size of a cucumber"
dont worry about it. i always have emergency bong water with me
You didn't have enough money so you tried to convince the cashier that "four dollar foot long" rolled off the tongue better. Stop drinking. Immediately.
After doing lines off my chest, she said, "do you even know how fast I could suck your cock right now?!!" and her friend said, "yea she totally could".
i told the cop we knew everyone at the party, it was 250 of our closest friends and she's like funny nobody on the balcony knew whose house this was
Thats why they were on the balcony!
did you just send me my own nude
Jesus christ. I put you on speaker when you called me last night and you told me to brush my teeth with a dick.
It's like fucking tetris in this bed
I will pepper spray him so fast I don't even care
Listen all I know is that mistakes were made and she stole the car and drove half an hour for food at 4 am
Randomize
