.....so he has a son. Josh. That is not his roommate
This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
The look your mother gives you when she sees you masterbating on web cam is unlike any I've seen before, but this is a case where, I would say, ignorance is bliss.
i feel like pocahontas...the disney character not from real chance of love
She introduced herself and then asked "have you ever fucked a girl with a cast?"
When you went through airport security you asked if the could check if a baby was in there. That drunk.
Yea.. I remember nothing. Except that the taxi driver was 56 years old and apparently never cheated on his wife.
what is the most politically correct way to ask if he still hangs out with the guy that has blue hair and make meth in his car?
A homeless man walked up to me at the bar, pointed, and told me to get my shit together. Jesus?
I think 2012 will be the year I purposely put myself in awkward situations. Much like 2011 but really trying this time. Like fucking the little sister of a girl I already fucked and dating a chick that lives with her ex. It could be awesome or horrible.
I know it basically makes me the worst feminist ever, but I don't want to kill my own spiders. And I will pay my personal spider hit man with sammiches and unlimited , uninhibited access to my vagina.
After sending me a dick pic, he asked, "yay or nay?"
After you smoke one night. Just whisper in a barely audible voice, "Grey Poupon"
Can't talk, I'm icing "sorry I barfed on your couch" onto a cookie cake
...okay, you can't just say 'masturbating llama' and not explain yourself
Randomize
