I want to kish your cheek
My cheeks are in Michigan
Oh my lips are kind of stretchy
Anal astronaut?
Wow word travels fast.
just jacked off with my ROTC uniform on. boy i feel like an american.
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
I'm on the bus going to class. And a cop just rolled by and I got nervous because I didn't have my seatbelt on. I have to stop smoking so much weed.
Crisis Situation. How do you have that "we probably shouldn't make out tonight cause i've got an oral herpes outbreak coming on" conversation on a third date.
I just woke up with a bunch of French fries in my hand and a chocolate shake balancing on my pillow. Lovely.
That sucks. I just talked to a telemarketer for 15 minutes about CSI: Miami and weed.
I fell alseep but then some dude picked me up. Comforter and all stuck a blunt in my mouth and carried me back downstairs because "I wasn't done partying"
I walked into the garage and you were telling the bikes that you were not that drunk.
But it's not about our feelings, it's about making the men we sleep with feel awful about their lives
Don't be embarrassed its me, I've licked your taint.
Fair warning birthday party last night avoid kitchen & upstairs bathroom if you value your remaining sanity
I'm trying to get laid this Halloween, not inspire the next season of AHS
Well, I told him that it's not all about him. Then I gave him the best blow-job in the history of blow-jobs.
Randomize
