I wish my cat could text because i would tell him that everything will be ok. and i wish he could send them back..but him have no thumbs. him no know what he would text with.
we just toasted to your mouth on alex's balls at the bar
I remember your 21st ending with me driving you home while you insisted making bicycle signals out the car window.
He asked me to coffee and I had no choice but to be honest. So naturally I told him that sobriety and monogomy are not two of my strong suits.
well the blowjob for study guide exchange was a success.
You're fine
I'm hiding in my chest because my walls smell weird. I'm not fine.
I can't take any time off so I'll be here drinking mimosas til I puke at home with my kitty
Celebrating anything "Eve" is never a good choice! I feel like my soul's been put in a blender on the "destroy" setting- in other news: Happy 4th of July
We boned on a bench in a park, french people were walking by cheering us on. Totally acceptable
Haha. Fifty shades ain't got shit on me. My tits look like they got in a fight.
Turn on the Discovery Channel
Lets fuck to motorcycle gang fighting
Now some guy that's in my phone as " Alex lip ring hot" is texting me and I don't where life is taking me
That's what jaeger bombs out of teacups will do to you.
I got snowed in at my parent's. everyone's asleep so I'm smoking a joint in my old room and watching Tarzan on a 12" tv.
They must be so glad to have you home...
QUICK FAX ME THE BALL
Not how faxing works at all btw
Randomize
