just woke up. wallet empty. bottle empty. tattoo in pen on my arm. smell like bad sex. woke up alone. and wall-e is playing on my computer. need answers.
2 nights ago she wants to see other people, tonight she wants to have a threesome. The GOOD kind of threesome. So... win?
i feel as if its time to shave my pubes but i should wait until before the party. nobody likes a sloppy drunk girl with a stubble-crotch.
story of my life.
i woke up in the lobby of Holiday Inn on a chair sitting up straight
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It's hard to believe so much cum came out of such a small penis.
this is what happens when you pick a roommate a year in advance.. she ends up hating you for hooking up with for of her extended family members
I've started a list of places i want to drink. To go along with the list of places i want to have sex. Lincoln's log cabin is on both.
Just checked my voicemails on the work phone on speaker. Thank you so much for the one of you screaming "COME FUCK ME NOWWWW!" my boss loved it ..
he fucked me with his goalie mask on. it was like sleeping with Darth Vader
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is 36 too old to fuck a college student? THIS IS BOTH IMPORTANT AND TIME SENSITIVE
Don't be upset because I bitch slapped you with intelligence
are you really asking me this. do you KNOW how many times i masturbate in a day? yeah. wrong person to ask about romance.
YOU CANT JUST BLOW GUYS BC THEY’RE NICE TO YOU LEXI
I CAN IF I WANT TO
My mom is dancing slutty on the bar I need more drinks to be ok with this
The only thing I remember about us having sex is yelling at him to choke me.
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