i get turned down more than a collar. where are the desperate bitches i need to crawl to them
she was bad bro. like...id rather put my dick in a blender. twice.
The only pictures he has from one of the biggest football weekends is an album titled "I miss my dog" filled with tons of pictures of his dog and him. This relationship must end.
Two kids are drinking pounders in class. I think I'm hanging out with the wrong group of friends.
His dick was poking my bladder. That big...
Houston, we have a blender
I tried to interpretive dance to Candy Shop to stop the awkwardness.
You had the nerve to crowd surf to your own bedroom.. I guess watching Aladdin high was probably the best idea ever
did i make more ranch sandwiches last night
you had 4
And the prospective student I was showing around had to take care of me.
HEY. NO. THIS IS ABOUT YOU RIGHT NOW. YOUR COCK, MY MOUTH, THATS IT.
You passed out in your dogs bed and you only willingly woke up because I told there was a bottle of vodka and a snickers bar waiting for you upstairs
I'm excited for him and his new girlfriend. I'm just going to miss his penis is what I'm saying.
boys just don't understand what they're missing out on.
he's missing out on my boobs looking marvelous this evening.
so let me get this straight you just stared at his boner all night?
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