Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
my tits taste like a pina colada. how often do you get to say that?
if she mentions anything about chili and my phone, just go with it
I feel like somehow my uterus ended up in my ribcage from all the keg stands i did last night..
How many folks do you know who bring coke to a dinner party. Seriously.
Make the kitchen floor stop waving. Im trying to lay on it
I made a side by side comparison of her Facebook pic and the chick on the anti meth billboards. Plus a ven diagram showing mostly shared physical attributes. I sent u the PowerPoint. You were sufficiently warned.
I just found out that order of 30 Beefy 5-Layers last weekend has achieved legendary status among the Taco Bell employees. Is there a Stoner Achievement for that?
his daughter has his phone and goesss ohhh boobies and shows me a picture of my own tits...
Just remember, the Browns have more wins than Ronda Rousey this year.
i feel like a cleansing fire is the only way to purify the house
My boss and I ended up at the same strip club. We both got lap dances while talking about work.
You went outside, peed in the front yard, and asked me to bring you some toilet paper.
Our entire day shift is on either molly or acid. I'm about to take two hits of the latter.
in mid sex he pointed out my great gatsby tattoo and we started discussing themes and metaphors from our fave fitzgerald novels
you need to stop fucking English majors
Randomize
