Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
I just found your credit card inside the bag of chips
the girl next to me in class just threw up in a waterbottle during our exam.
Just spent 45mins blow drying a joint i dropped in a beer....i felt like i dropped his infant child....
i wish i was a boy too so i knew what a blow job felt like
All the walks of shame were condensed into the hour before parents started showing up. Move out day is so bittersweet
today's the one month anniversary of me not giving anyone head. can you tell me you're proud
it's sad that this is a milestone
playing nyquil roulette. it entails taking shots of nyquil and hoping it doesnt kick in during sex or in public. game on.
U can find me on my couch hungover eatin tuna evaluating my life
I mean thanks for the bj but i wanna forget everything that happened last night between 11 and 5
And then I told him since the day he walked away to get over what I went through he lost the boyfriend right to ask why my bed is broken.
I take full pride in being the one that broke ur bed. Want to go for the sofa?
I draw, I play three woodwind instruments, I press buttons for eight hours at work and Im studying to be a gynecologist... I guarantee I can make you squirt, babe.
I guess she fell asleep at the strip club and the other one was crying because she had a vagina in her face. Happy 21st!
Sometimes i think i need to stop drinking because i can't afford losing so many panties anymore
And you said I'm not athletic, I rubbed one out with my sports band on, it's the same as walking 1/4 mile.
Randomize
