good luck with ur interview. Just show them your confidence and don't make that sucking snot noise. Really don't. Praying for you, love mom
I think one day, after evolution kicks in, my sons will thank me for having a 3rd ball. That's how much sex I'm having.
I wish I could go back in time 3 years and tell my freshman self how easy it is to hook up with freshmen
i think i figured out where our problem might have started...when we poured more tequila on top of out margaritas to melt the ice bc they were too cold
hahaha or putting rum in the bbq sauce?
27 Drunk People That Pissed Off The Cops And Got What They Deserved
I can now tell my grandchildren Central Park has really great spots for quickies...
Please make the clown in the corner stop judging me. I mean he's the one with paint on his face. I don't need him judge judying me.
She fell asleep with me.... We found her pantsless in the dogbed in the morning... Russian foreign exchange students
Hope you had your fill for the summer my friend, because all the cleavage has been put away for the winter. Fear not; it blooms again in May.
The 12 year old son winked and made eyes at me while his father fed me vodka gummy bears. Gameday yo
These 25 Soulless Industries Have Been Scamming Us For Years
you passed out while setting up your phones timer to time how long it would take before you to passed out.
Orientation leader success, day 1: incoming freshman just ate out his first sorority girl. I gave him a 7/10.
I shouldn't be drunk at 3 pm but alas, here we are...
the hole that the tears left- fill it with pizza
Sabotage it. Cum quick. Make it awkward so you don't hurt her feelings. Who says nice guys finish last?
I would give a kidney to fuck him and he knows it. That bastard.