i just won an entire level on word mole with the word 'clitoris'
your tears are not going to buy me drinks...
I want to give my boyfriend great head for his birthday...can i practice on you?
Either he masturbated at the end of the bed or she gave him a bj. Either way my bed was shaking and I was uninvolved.
25 Of The Most Cringeworthy Internet Stalking Fails
Dude squirt doesnt even begin to describe it i thought she was the lost portal to atlantis with how much she let out
im breathing rainbows and everyone is talking in bubbles whatever you gave me give me more
Oh wait looks like my cousin is getting deported THERE'S HOPE FOR THIS CHRISTMAS YET
He needs to seriously stop texting me at 3am for sex. Late night and early morning hours are for the guys who DON'T bust a nut in the first 5 minutes of making out.
Yeah minute men are best for late afternoons when you're inbetween running errands and have nothing to do.
Nothing ends a night of heavy drinking better than banging to three six mafia in your own driveway
21 People Who Barely Escaped Death
this night just went from meh to biblical thanks to drunk naked yahtzee
He had all the grace of a fucking hippo and the emotional control of a five year old
You could see the bone sticking out of his shin and he insisted he was "just gunna walk it off"
All I've had to eat today are potatoes...and by that I mean vodka and chips
After my shift today I'm going on a bender. Not saying this so you'll stop me, just a heads up to invest in Tylenol, Gatorade, and Jack
Is it rude to send him a, "happy birthday, I hope you finally get an STD" text?