Got separated, got a half bj, got dropped off in random part of the city, don't tell anyone
i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
Best moment of my life. I just got a text from some random number that said i can't wait to touch you. Her name is kiara and she had the wrong number.
we got so high we spray painted his girlfriend's UGG boots. she's CRYING. it's hysterical.
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
chasing schnapps with beer is a terrible idea. never been drunk at 3PM before. please help please please please please
so he came over for the first time and i completely forgot i had pictures of him printed out from facebook on my wall and a newspaper article with him in it.. you can guess that it lead for an awkward situation.
His dick might not be the answer to my problems, but I'm definitely ok with testing it as a possible solution.
I say we get drunk before the exam tomorrow. At least then we have a valid excuse for failing.
For your information i will be shotgunning whiskey on may 21st.
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
I need to stop drinking and eating and start working out. I look like the lovechild of John Goodman and Jabba the Hutt.
stop calling me dude. finger blasting me officially kills you being able to call me dude.
yep you were here saturday. if you woke up smelling like vanilla i can explain.
Is singing the Indiana Jones theme while I put on the condom off limits?
I'm not the one who can lose their erection, so it's fair game
my mom asked if I found my Easter basket. it's 1PM & I got home an hour ago from last night. if I'm looking for anything, it's my dignity.
It must have been good head...he put down the Xbox controller