Pretty sure my dad just walked in on me jerking off watching guys on webcam. Remember how I used to say "most awkward day of my life?" I'm retiring that phrase.
So for Valentine's Day...I finally swallowed. I feel like I earned that steak.
I swear that when I have my own bathroom, I'm gonna lock myself in there and masterbate for at least 3 days in sheer appreciation of it.
What the hell did I do to get youtube to recommend a video for me called "how to increase your chances of getting pregnant"?
21 People Confess What It’s Really Like At An Orgy
My girlfriend was pissed, so if I had to guess, i'd say I had a GREAT time last night
i'm not sure if i'm mentally prepared for this.. politeness? proper grammar? book reader ? this is a whole new meaning of the species penis for me.
I need a pic of your cock for our cock collage
She rode an inflatable shark down the stairs. Viva shark week.
I'm sitting with my parents watching football and moaned when I saw his shirtless picture. They looked at me weird so I had to turn the moan into a laugh. A sad, really horny laugh.
These 15 Honest Illustrations Show What Women Do When No One Is Watching
You left something at the house but since I'm back home now so I can just mail it over. Address?
I didn't realize you could put dignity in a box these days.
He's practically not my boyfriend anymore. So let's go get some glitter, balloons, alcohol and forget this night ever happened.
I'd rather blow Nickelback than be told he gave me gonorrhea. I'd even post it on Facebook for all of the world to like, share, and judge me.
In related news... Actually, nope. I don't have any orgy-related news. You win.
She's the perfect storm of great hair, big boobs, intellectualism, and mild moral ambiguity.
That moment during finals day when you either convince your teacher to let you out of the room or you shit you pants.