put your party hat on. and by party hat I mean no panties
i dont think my boyfriend knows how much of a pain it is to shave my ass
elementary school lunch room party. everyone brings their own lunch and can trade stuff. all juice is booze.
it was funny though when you first woke up you pointed at my shoe and said i need my jacket and then put my shoe on your hand
I take back everything I said about communal showers
Yeah, all the sudden I heard a loud "ding" and realized I had been passed out on the dorm elevator for about an hour....
At some point we were all eating banana flavored rolling papers.
I mean i can't really be mad...either way i was gonna fuck him or hate fuck him, so it's basically a win/win situation.
High Amy loves you. Sober Amy is unsure, but she's not here so fuck that bitch.
And really all I wanted was to be like "hey can I borrow your dick for a few hours this weekend?"
The cop let me finish my J before he cuffed me. Coolest arresting officer ever.
I told her I was going to sleep early last night. I probably should not have sent that snapchat of us playing beer pong.
this is the last time i am going to a 7am booty call
I was just at the gas station and happened to look left and see a girl blowing some guy. How was your night?
I dont need your sympathy!!!! Just a fifth of vodka and gummy bears...lots and lots of gummy bears to take my agression out on.
Randomize
