It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
i told him that if he starts being sappy its friends = off. he called me jerkface and drew on me w permanent marker. im either in love w him or we are twelve.
I just saw a stripper wear a tube top around her floppy gut. God bless Michigan.
I'm glad you talked me out of that flying penis tattoo.
It was literally me in an evening gown and him in a tux with six bottles of Vodka at Jons.
And this was for your brother's Christening?
I knew it was different as soon as you told me you slept with him and didn't tell me about his dick
I just keep sniffing it hoping for an explanation.
We fucked in your water heater closet. Told you we'd try everywhere.
She scratched my sunburn during sex. I didn't know whether to cry or cum
college stoner meal of the day: microwaved nutrigrain bars
Consider it an appointment to improve my blow job capabilities.
I accidentally flashed three cops last night. Stone cold sober.
Most of my life can be described like an HBO prison drama.
Money making scheme, blow job proof mascara. Waterproof is bullshit
I was so high I could TASTE the fillings in my teeth
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