11:03 p.m. Whats a lie i you lovn me. Let's cuddle.
she didnt even puke last nite, shes finally hit champion status. i think im in love
you did pass out in the elevator last night, so it could be motion sickness
How could you not be happy? Its like "and then I found 5 dollars" but "and then I found a handle of vodka"
Theres been so much buildup for our genitals to meet, one or both of us is sure to be disappointed.
So i do have strep. My apologies to the british guy from this weekend. You now have one more reason to hate america
I totally just potholed and almost crashed while trying to lick salsa off my boob.
Fucking finally I'm about to die from sobriety over here
When you see a guy in a wheelchair try to be cool and pop a wheelie, and then fall over backward and hit his head, is it funny or sad?
Okay I shall begin. Thank you Swedish chef
Hurrfy smmurdshy burrfst!
That is the exact response I was looking for.
Don't wake me up to tell me to cook for you because you don't like taco meat.
I decided taking Molly and seeing Birdman seemed like a wise life choice.
Also send boobie pics with bobs burgers in background its the only way to get me off anymore
Will Smith has a direct hotline to my emotions
I mean, I already hooked up with her boyfriend. The least I can do is accept her facebook friend request.
Randomize
