And God said, "Let there be Twilight," and it was so.
I should injure you considerably.
how do you have sooo much energy?
billy mays threw in a lil somethin extra when i ordered some oxiclean last week
I guess calling a coworker a lesbian sea cow is some kind of violation.
i keep walking around campus wondering if anyone is as stoned as i am
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I may or may not be drunk driving a golf cart. Vegaaaassssssss.
The stoners next door have their couch on the sidewalk again, shirtless, soaking their feet in a baby pool and listening to loud ukulele music. I want their life.
Good thing I was dressed to impress in my "I went nuclear on my wings" shirt even the girls are making out and I'm still 7th wheeling it...
Stoned ambition #8. Must learn sign language.
They had half off shots during the fourth quarter. I was powerless.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
and do you remember when you were dressing me if i had money in my bra?
Just did a walk of shame dressed as a cowgirl and walked past his ex's entire sorority. Yippee kye aye, motherfucker.
There is a severe lack of banging on that itinerary... I'd like a revision on my desk within the hour
I found my soulmate. Behold my idiot as we spaz into the sunset.
Like you haven't hit rock bottom until you have had to throw your own turd out a window
? I'm just sitting watching something borrowed alone, crying in my boxers , feel like I should probably do something
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