well I can't set my house on fire every night
Dude, Erin Andrews has a nude video circulating the internet.
Is it any good?
Let me put it this way: I bet Stuart Scott's lazy eye went straight after watching that.
rainy day on campus = new personal fetish for girls in booty shorts and colorful rain boots
I just bought a CD. I feel like a traitor to my generation.
Housekeeping called in a homicide detective. Just spent an hour explaining that we had vigorous hotel vacation sex five times, even though I was having a heavy flow day. It'll definitely be what you call a memorable honeymoon.
I could write a book on how to barely get by in community college. I just took an online quiz on my phone, at the bar, 6 minutes before it was due.
THERE WAS A HANDPRINT OF BLOOD ON HIS SHOULDER
Take advantage man but know that every anal bead u drop inside her will make her love u 2% more. It's science
There's an old guy having a conversation with his penis in the bathroom right now.
Besides the kids on acid... I was the highest kid there
Shut up. The only friend I need in life is Jim Beam because life is meaningless.
My autobiography will be 500 pages of the words "I probably should've thought this through" typed over and over.
See I am maturing. I just got in from my DRIVE of shame......
He showed up in a Prius. I didn’t even wanna.... So I left.
It's like a donut of clothes around a pair of heels. Like they were transported to another dimension naked.
Randomize
