is it sad that i think every plant i pass on the highway looks like a plant from farmville?
I just criticized a porno's use of editing. Film school is ruining me.
He still lectured me about forgetting shit. Than he said he's gonna paint me green so I can stand in a corner and be a plant.
Walk-of-shaming home in that dress you got arrested in. Six guys called out your name when I walked past. I've never been more proud of us.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm sorry i ruined our friendship with a boner
you had a pretty long talk with your shrooms in attempt to make them not give you a bad trip, it failed
sometimes after I smoke and the high has gone away...the high will come back like three hours later for a brief yet gripping ride.
that's usually when I end up in someone's house, having sex with someone else, while that someone's roommate makes us mozzarella sticks.
My last two google searches are "shiny things" and "Ohio consent laws." you should visit more often.
I have to shave my legs first. I'm afraid tiny woodland creatures will fly out if he tries touches them.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just did the walk of shame in monkey slippers in the snow
Teach me the song of your people
You would seriously think I would remember who put themselves in my phone as Burt Rynalds Moustache, but I don't. And I need to be reminded of who you are so I can give you a proper high five.
I knew it was on when all she had to say about the handcuffs was 'I really hope these adjust tighter!'
It's the eve of Christ's birthday and I'm sending pictures of my tits
I think I sold my soul to a dominatrix last night.
Dude my roommate just peed out the window
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