Uggggg i want to leave and get bombed over baghdad
suddenly SuperBad didn't seem so funny anymore...she did have her period on my leg.
i knew it was time to leave when he woke me up only wearing pooh bear oven mitts and holding a plate of thank you pancakes
There r osticjed everywhere
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My ex came to my place while I was gone. Random things he took: snow shoes, my laundry quarters, a decorative picture, all my condiments, the container that held my rice and a sticker off my wallet. Then left a note saying he watered my plants and fed my cats. What. The. Fuck.
That just sounds like a recipe for sex in my backyard. Yes.
Well if I'm going to hook up with every ethnicity by the end of undergrad, I need to be moving on
Fuck my life, there's a fry in my vagina.
My life has become one weird ass game. No one wins. No one loses. We all just kind of hang in limbo and hope we don't die. Eskimo sisters for life. Please have sex with one of them.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I ran into my parents house and stole a bottle of vodka last night...Apparently left them a note that read "DRUNK. TOOK VODKA. BRING MORE."
Well I was kicked out of the bar and woke up on a picnic table. I'd say the night was awesome!
The Olympian is in my bed
you gave me money for the cab and then walked home..
Pro tip: If you tell him that his dick looks like a muppet then you won't have to see him again.
He unliked all of my pictures on instagram, I don't know whats worse, the fact that he did it or the fact that I noticed..
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