It doesn't matter if they shave you or not, you're still susceptible to the staph infection.
My dad just told me he used to masturbate to cat woman...he then proceeded to beat my brother in beer pong and wont let me play...
my three year anniversary of no dick sucking is coming up. you can throw me a party with a penis cake.
Can I have my ID back now or are you using it to crossdress again?
Quick question, how many times can you get chlamydia before your vagina just gives up and falls off?
I just wanna be craddled in his arms and spoon fed applesauce..
that's the most romantic thing you've ever said.
WHAT DID YOU SAW VERBATIM. VERBATIM IS SOBER FOR WORD FOR WORD
Please collect your boy friend. He semi-passed out on the couch and trying to grab bums as people walk by. Anyone's bum, he's not choosy.
My synapses wont fire in a pattern that will process those facts
So I have to send you an email about my weekend, heretofore referred to as The Perfect Weekend. Wherein I have lots of awesome sex with a guy with THE MOST AMAZING BODY.
I look forward to this email. I will respond with, Condoms and Creepers: The Adventures of Online Dating.
So when the drug raid cops tell you, you should get out of the relationship, it probably means its time.
I realize designer coke was a douchey thing to say but the point of the story is I did bath salts
we could do so many fantastic illegal things together. sexually and otherwise.
All this studying of HIV makes me want to have sex with you.
Third time this week I've caught co workers dry humping. Quarantine really changes people's priorities.
Randomize
