this coming from the guy that still thinks "pulling out" is a good form of birth control? just walk away
planned parenthood is perfect for picking up chicks...they all put out
'in an unhealthy relationship' should def be an fb option
I just got a ticket for the snow penis we made in our front yard.
I just saw a guy in front of the courthouse giving himself a sobriety test and fail it...this can't end well
She was the most uninteresting drunk I've met
dizzyuy bat. 3.453 lkos. hoit sx, now im single. blackouteed
She took a crow from her moms Halloween decorations, taped it to her shoulder, went to the bar and made the guys buy a drinks for both her and the crow.
the last guy with this job had a bookshelf fall on him. He's in the Er. Im high and they gave me his shift. How do you think i feel?
She has a boyfriend. But if he's a decent human being he understands blowjobs don't count as cheating with her. Keeping those miracles to himself is a crime against humanity.
His roommate left already and took the beer pong table so we had to take off his bedroom door. Maybe res life won't notice.
Remember when I asked you to make sure I didn't go home with anything less than a 6 last night? You're fired
It's not a real holiday until someone pees on you. Did someone pee on you?
Going to dump some dried Xanax powder into some Mac and cheese. Can't think of a better way to avoid tasting it.
That makes sense.. A good Bj is a trump card in any argument
Randomize
