It doesn't matter if they shave you or not, you're still susceptible to the staph infection.
Of course we end up in a gay bar... And I have to tell you there are some hot dudes here, should I pass around your Facebook?
Dude, I woke up at my ex's house. I am spooning her half naked roommate. There is a pizza on my shoulder. I need you to come pick me up.
Your French couch surfers have just started playing flip cup with old crow. Basically you need to come back here
Facebook stalking ex-girlfriends who went to rehab. This is my life.
The fact that there are multiple ex-girlfriends who have been to rehab concerns me
I don't know how we managed to stay up but we actually sat in front of her open refrigerator for god knows how long while she ate salami straight out of the package with her fingers and I laughed. It was a trainwreck.
Long story short he broke into a preschool and threw all their cones into a tree.
I got tossed from adult league soccer for telling a 55 year old I'd break his hip. I'm a productive member of society
She just told me she thinks she bruised her labia in class
So wise, so handsome, so good at oral sex.
He's going to find out eventually, but really what's he going to do? Cry about it and buy another fucking kitten??
She just asked me if I was going to stay the night. I responded "I know that we are upside down".
Had sex outside for the third time last night. Mosquito bites all over my ass, and i think i have a rash on my nipples. When will i learn.
Just wait till winter
Honestly, I am sitting in my room watching Ciara videos and thinking I am super jealous of how she rides it.
I can't believe I slept with a girl who has the words shucks in her vocabulary. I'm getting less picky by the day..
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