how much land on farmville do you have now? i sold all my shit to make room i need more money... these animals need to know I'm running a business not a charity.
nothing like a negative hiv test and a bag of condoms to brighten my day.
I imagine the nuva ring like a bug zapper. It just kills them all.
You stood up gave the stripper 15 ones in a wad, hugged her and then sat back down.
I wonder if our vaginas are like "o thank god, no strangers breaking in tonight." Baahhhh sooo bad
You stuck a chicken finger in that stripper's clevage and said "Keep this warm for me.
Its not chugging if its just one gulp
Crappy Mother's Day to you! Those of us who don't have children fill the void with hot sex, sleeping in, more sex, leisurely suntanning, foreign travel, overseas sex, paying cash for sports cars, watching TV, having sex on the floor in front of TV porn, lounging around the house, or whatever the hell we want.
BUT I think maybe Thursday in celebration of America we should probably tan and see how fast we can finish everything in the liquor cabinet.
Did you take the bag w/your drugs & cookie cutter?
My parents are paying for my knee surgery for my birthday. What costume will look good on crutches for my Halloween Birthday?
Welcome to adulthood.
I had one beer! ONE BEER! They took shots in mourning of my tolerance last night. My ability to drink is a joke.
i'm gonna crowd surf you onto his dick
He told me was "pretty like the wife in some movie where the husband is a cheater." I think I'm gonna fuck him.
Sundays were made for eating Ramen pantless in bed.
Randomize
