just heard the best thing ever: calling people's kids "fuck trophies"
Keeping hand sanitizer and lube in the same drawer in the same size bottle = awful idea
I wonder if they've ever made a porno about the song "she'll be comin' round the mountain when she comes"
how much land on farmville do you have now? i sold all my shit to make room i need more money... these animals need to know I'm running a business not a charity.
whenever I think of his sister, I just picture a chick with a huge beard
It's called 'beer pong' not 'everclear and coke pong' for a reason...
throwing up in the shower isnt as glamorous as i expected
since when the fuck is that glamorous?
Well now that I've given all the athletes mono there goes our chance of winning any conference championship
you can't tell me you didn't shit your pants I saw them in the trash can by the bathroom.
Oh and no more ball pics to my family. Got in a little trouble over that. They have no sense of humor.
I WOKE UP IN A FUCKING DOG BED HOW DO YOU THINK I FEEL
What's dad's email?
askmom@cause.idk
You cried for a while then lifted lots of weights then cady's ex put glitter on your tits and then you took a nap. I got you pizza and brought you home. Nothing too exciting.
It doesn't count as "finding the lesbian" if you fuck a straight girl!
I've given up on the male species, I'm just going to be a lonely whore for the rest of my life.
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