Theres a random in my bed. Omg but at least he's a law student?
I understand how i shit in my shoes, but explain why you were wearing them.
dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
Just ran into that chick u called from my phone and left her a MSG bout how she has aids
Ahaha, good shit
All I remember is holding on to the elevator asking it politely to stop spinning
Well I tried to steal a golf cart. I fought with the Chick-Fil-A cow. And other things.
Drunk. I slept-stripped.
By myself.
Thanks for stopping me from letting that 14 year old feel my boobs. Thanks.
I don't know if I want to cry scream puke or go somewhere and drink more. This is such a weird emotion.
Pretty sure I can show you the text you sent me stating some interest in my penis entering your mouth if said circumstances were met.
We're like Siamese twins, but joined at the genitals.
on a brighter note, the cop thought i could kick adams ass if it came down to that and said he had $20 on me if it ever happens
I am literally this close to screaming out my window if anyone nearby was down to fuck. I am too damn horny.
fuck st louis. fuck their hockey. fuck their basball. fuck their football if they still got it. fuck their tiddlywinks teamm. fuck their ribs. fuck their entire city. what im trying to say is i dont like st louis
that blonde bartender and I racked up an impressive mini bar bill last night
Mini bar? Did you get a hotel room?
Yeah, the last thing I need right now is a chick with an insane clown posse tattoo knowing where I live
That’s legit
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