Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
her vagina probably looks like a grenade went off in a deli
The make-up sex just reminded me why we broke up in the first place.
I will show your tits more attention than Michael Jackson's death.
I cant. I'm trying to smell my vagina.
Get dressed up for her? please, I could shit my pants and she would still blow me
just to let you know coffee and vodka was a bad way to start the day
Don't worry. I has chaperone.
Sorry you called when I was puking in a cheetos bag
It was really weird walking into a CVS and not going straight to the pharmacy for plan B.
I thought that u needed a break due the fact that your nipples were bleeding
How many people can say they've shit on the floor of a five star hotel?
I AM COVERED IN FAKE BLOOD AND REAL CUM. I AM AWESOME
Thank you <3 he just looked at me, fist bumped me, and asked me what was on my titty....we may cut her off
He sent me a pic of her engagement ring and then STILL asked for nudes.
Randomize
