If you think im a hippy you should see these girls. They would scissor mother nature if they had the chance.
if this week's events in iraq have taught me anything, it's that when pulling out, always expect a mess...
Acid is not a monday night drug
it tasted disgusting. but i pretty much drank it in the name of science, and free alcohol
I feel like I owe it to them to wear pants.
I guess I'm in a committed relationship. We just had shot 1 of 3 of Gardasil. I'm now dead inside.
You pretended to pelvic thrust my mother on the boat while my 92 year old grandmother looked on. Thanks.
Shit. I'm suppose to call the bank but I'm too high to talk numbers.
So do you want to hear how I got the hickey first, or how I got the black eye?
Please tell me that I didn't call you to say I was swimming in outter space
Had sex in a blanket fort. How was your weekend?
I'm glad you got documented proof of my stupidity with a head full of nitrous
Hahaha and I'm glad you are doing whip its at a childrens basketball game
It started off with wine and ended up with me in only my pearls and heels. It was about the classiest sexual experience I've ever had.
just drove past - why are you walking towards the shop in your pyjamas?
Can't talk, on a quest for bacon.
She asked me if I could do that to her every single time. I said nope. sometimes it's better.
Randomize
