Oh. Thats cool. Im not dating anyone right now. Sean gave me chlamydia from some GUY he fooled around with. Im being abstinent.
His little brother just walked in, asked me if I'd blown his brother yet and then announced that he and his friends were going to play outside so we could play too.
That's the international "my vagina is unoccupied, come talk to us" chant. You have your mission. Go.
I think I'm just going to up-end a bottle of wine and look through pictures of what my life used to be.
The pigeons can smell the fear
Wtf
I feel like despite his sleaziness I could be friends with this man. he just sent me a picture of his dog's balls.
Totally. Bang on. He'll be fine. He might cry into your perfect tits once in a while, but that's the price ya pay.
He must have found my secret supply of blow and took a bump before we left the house. Rude.
He could of at least asked
I woke up like how did I get here this blanket is nice but it was just the curtain
So, I'm either with my future life partner or my future life taker. And his brother. lol. I'll let you know when I get home alive.
Congrats you've received dick pics from an Olympic silver medalist
Its weird to introduce me to his wife and kids on the first date, right?
I just walked in on her masturbating to a social anxiety video...
Seeing her tonight. She doesn't want dinner, just wants me to come over for awhile. My penis just sent me a thank you card.
I hope no one at work can tell or smell that I have tequila in my hair and I haven't showered for days
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