just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
She might as well just lie down with one of those red "Easy Buttons" next to her
I can mark tailgating, going to the game and getting road head off my to do list today
Was waiting for the adderal to kick in then realized I had been brushing my teeth for eighteen minuites
Dude I live in a fucking closet and still get laid every weekend. Figure it out.
Any man who has a face like that and a bike, deserves a vagina like yours permanently.
I just spent a pre-4th of july celebration riding in a raft being towed by a car through a town that I've never heard of handing out flyers for a river rafting company that I never knew existed. Good night.
You made a course evaluation for your vagina? Wow. You really are a professor now.
Two women at the Safeway just got out of their separate cars and kissed. One was driving an outback, the other a CRV. It was like a Honda and Subaru had a lesbian joint venture and filmed the commercial in front of me.
My dad picked me up from the bus station and as soon as he saw me he yelled "bus backwards is SUB!" and started laughing, I'm like 800% sure he's stoned. I'm so happy I came home for spring break.
she's fucked both of my roommates but not me. i feel like I'm not part of the group anymore
I thought i didnt really feel whatever i snorted last night until i just realized i think i asked this dude to punch me fight club style
Just smoked the bong while taking a dump. I love living by myself.
I know that you sometimes make decisions based on comedic effect, but losing your virginity shouldn't be one of them.
Tacos and sex are way better than any anti depressant pill ever was. I think I made a medical discovery here.
Randomize
