Do you remember getting into a Delorean last night?
tonight would not even compare to the night i tried to pee in the living room
Last night was so much fun. i kept trying to lick everyone
He made sure to throw up on the Mexico side of the border while we were in line at the check point. Then finished by screaming you an have it back. You can have it all back.
I'm at a free clinic. Feel like I should cough or sneeze so it's not blatantly obvious I'm getting checked for STI's.
Somehow ended up at a stranger's bridal shower. Everyone else is already drunk.
is it sad that i can describe this night as "the night that i was sober" and we all know which night it was. like literally one night of sobriety.
yeah i didn't know anyone, but i just walked in with a lit sparkler and wearing a budweiser shirt and someone handed me a beer.
One thing noone tells you about getting put in the drunk tank is do it barefoot. You get free flipflops.
ur not supposed to find someone to make out with when ur bf takes u to his SISTERS house to hang out with her and her husband
Yeah. Not my best idea. But I'm hoping for the best . And by best, I mean not jail
If I had really thought it through, I would have bought some Depends, popped one on and made this night my bitch.
I feel like on the last day of finals we should run around campus dressed like Moses screaming "LET MY PEOPLE GO!!!!"
I'll start the recruiting
I feel like I shouldn't be encouraging my friends to hook up with their teachers.....but if it's for academic reasons....then I definitely encourage it.
i just woke up on the desk in his dorm with him snoring in my vagina. better than last week waking up to a different guy puking on my bare ass i guess.
Randomize
