so heres a good story. about 6 hrs ago i took a bath with bruce blasting. and 6 hrs later i woke up still in my bathtub but in cold water
I swear I am going to pee, wipe my vag with my hand, and then slap you in the face with it.
Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
tip of the day : never have sex with a full bladder. it WILL lead to complications and a very unhappy partner.
Weed smoke burps in the boss's face. Job security.
This place doesnt have redbull or serve shots. Its like they are at war with fun.
once you started introducing yourself as "running-bear" i knew you were beyond fucked up
I'm so bored right now i'm literally Googleing all the possible ways to get high with household items as my mom is sitting in front of me..
Was I really yelling "girls night" at random chicks before stealing and drinking all their shots?
Okay. thanks for sacraficing your body and risking aids for our snowcone business.
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
The dominatrix coworker is currently listening to pop music that has been translated into an Irish dialect and sung by high school kids. Every day gets weirder here.
Do you remember vividly describing the shape and girth of my cock to that girl last night?
On another note, I think my upstair neighbor is having sex. How awkward would it be if I showed up to her door with a bag of Chipotle?
I just made myself 3 peanut butter sammies because I was too hungry to watch porn
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