apparently red wine has the total opposite effect that whiskey does on his dick
With sake I got over my irrational fear of seafood. Now I just fear sake.
Superbowl + Mdma, hope we're on the same page.
He wanted a handjob during a John Wayne movie. I just couldn't find it in my heart to disrespect that man. John Wayne that is.
For some reason I have a hard time believing getting drunk and recreating a movie about singing transvestites is ever very far from a situation you're in.
I am a human short and spout . Here is my jager Herr is my redbull . When i get real drink i shout out. Tip me over and pour yeager out
Makes Sense, i generally dont want the same person two days in a row. Its like what i pick for supper, i like variety
would it be mean if I put better with the lights off on my sex playlist just for my hook up with him?
Cant really say how it happened but i woke up in the middle of the night and somehow pissed all over connors dad
My Canadian brought me three bottles of maple syrup, a sunflower, and a pair of Oakleys back to the states...he's either drunk or he loves me
He texted his hospitalized grandma while inside me, so really a perfect gentleman.
If walking through the neighborhood with a bottle of tequila and margarita mix is postgrad life, I'm okay with it
I woke up with a jacket; in it passport, hockey tickets, sunglasses, credit card, bank transactions
In other news there's 12 shirtless Korean dudes all trying to jump on a tiny little trampoline so that's entertaining
Don’t listen to me, I’m walking around wearing nothing but rave bracelets and headphones shouting “yeeeeaaahhhhhh”
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