so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
she's got a whisker from her dead cat taped to the wall. I'm pretty sure that about sums it up...
Google Chrome's "top 8 most visited sites" page has become my motivation to stop masturbating
He told me I took off my shirt, asked for the latino thunder and jumped on him. I want to question this but it sounds too much like me.
he told me he expects me to keep the fangs on when i go down on him. presumptuous, yes, but man after my own heart.
I'm sorry. I think I have multiple personalities. Or it was the acid. Either way. I'm sorry.
You did that scary laugh you always do when you're blacking out except she's never heard it before and though you were choking and screamed at all of us when we didn't call an ambulance
I came back and almost ran over two people passed out in my driveway I've never met before in my life
I'm going as either a recovering alcoholic, or as a guy who came to the party straight from work. Too literal?
So guess who got away with telling their girlfriend she's insane multiple times in a Valentine's day card. Yup, this guy.
My dad handed me a drink and said, "This'll knock your dick in the dirt..."
I woke up in confetti... confetti and shame
The only thing I remember from last night is being naked in his bed if that's not summer drinking at it's finest then I don't wanna live anymore
Wednesday is good, I needed the head count for the orgy, caroling can happen with as few as 2 people. There will be a pinata.
For the caroling or the orgy?
there are not enough nopes in the world for that situation.
Randomize
