If you want to dance with a less than stellar Asian chick, I have just the girl for you.
so pretty much your parents know your seeing a girl on the side, let her come over and just dont say anything to your girlfriend?
I would give away a ton of these clothes but I doubt there are any homeless people who dress as slutty as me
I think vodka calistinics prior to and during beer olympics was a bad idea
You went to church with your boobs hanging out?
Theyr'e a gift from god, I figured I should show him i'm using them well.
You were so trashed that when you dropped your fruit rollup on the floor, you just sat next to it and cried.
found inexpensive tickets to Norway. Questioning if its legal. PLEASE tell me you remebered the walkie talkies and face paint.
saying that you may be able to suck the gay out of me was just my way of getting a blowjob...thank you for the valiant effort.
it's been dubbed the summer of antibiotics
I'd like to be considered more than just his fuck buddy thanks. IVE BEEN RISKING PREGNANCY FOR SEVEN GODDAMN MONTHS I DESERVE THE TITLE OF GIRLFRIEND
Finally better. I had to use eye makeup remover to get the purple wine stains off my lips
Rumor has it that you want to bring me soup in exchange for a blow job.
This is my college life. Rolling at 4PM on a Wednesday to skrillex in the parking lot of a mexican restaurant.
Have you ever got so drunk that you tasted the future?
They call you PBJ boy because you were trying to seduce me with pieces of a peanut butter and jelly sandwich. Successfully might I add.
Randomize