Haha no. But I cannot hook up with you anymore. Especially when you group text people.
After he proceded to violently molest my tits until 9 am i snuck out of his room only to meet his mother downstairs, who informed me she heard the giant sexfest going on in the room next to them.. this was before she called us both "chickenshits".. worst walk of shame ever.
something must definitely be wrong with me if i'm chasing after a guy who cant even get it up
Wait, we're on the hunt for addys and explosives. They're both in this house somewhere.
you'd be alarmed at how much plan b i just found in mom's bathroom...
To be honest I don't know what's worse, the fact that I interupted their shower sex or the fact that I was so drunk I used the adjoining stall anyway
First I must say that I am disappointed to learn that you knowingly have trashy friends with whom you've not hooked me up.
I'm going to make a mold of my tits to bake a cake for him for our anniversary.. I can see the pride in his eyes now.
2015 is a year for health and mental stability and alas we are not yet there so yolo
The quality of my porn watching experience has significantly declined. Thanks shattered iphone screen
Stop acting like the Lucky Charms you're feeding people is actually ecstasy.
This is either the best idea i've ever had or the worst. stay tuned.
Went to a club yesterday was dirty dancing with this guy, reached back to move my hair and punched him in the face.
ANTI-GAME
I am so proud to call you my friend
Mom got drunk as hell, crashed Dad's wedding and some how left with the best man. This is why you should be glad you aren't my sibling.
But you''re still having sex with him. And a hobo convinced you to.
Randomize
