I looked at my own cervix.
They've started ranking girls from "paper-bag" to "I just came." Please come get me
I managed to throw up 90 feet under water, just removed my breathing tube, puked, put it back in. All inclusive is the way to go.
Completly hung over at midnight, I knew there was a downside to drinking at 2pm
My mom gave me a high five when I told her I was just using him for sex
You and your mom would make an amazing tag team
I'm genuinely dissapointed that we didn't make any fat chicks cry
Oh shit. There are penis maracas
We waved. But it was a "let's hook up" wave.
My teacher just let our class out 30 minutes early, its a 50 minute class. He said the only thing we had to do was get fucked up tonight and have stories about it on Monday.
He told me we were going to a cabin. It's just logs and a tarp made into walls. This night can go either way at this point.
Mainly I just wanna pet bunnies. And purple chicks. Well any color chicks if I close my eyes. But purple if I open them.
Talking to him sober hurts my brain
How was the party
I came home with only one shoe, a t shirt tied around my shoeless foot and I was covered in motor oil. Oh and my shorts were inside out. So you tell me
I want you to defile me in my childhood bed.
I just realized u compared me to a coconut
Randomize
