Should I have kids to fix a relationship??
But sometimes ur dick treats me better than u do
And then i made him answer questions about me before i took off my clothes
She can't drink and she can't smoke weed. She might as well be dead to me.
He's trying to kill me, one liver cell at a time. It's going to be a slow, but awesome death
I just don't understand how a line to ride a camel on a college campus could be too long for you to wait in.
It's like split custody, only he's not a kid and they have sex with him.
Apparently you can talk a girl into leaving the bar and coming back to your tent, who knew?
finally remembered how I know that chick in my history class. she made and fed me ramen when I was wasted!
I still can't believe that I ate McDonald's off of my chest in his bed...
Cross faded me is not the classiest.
No not at all haha I wish there was a picture of that
Getting day drunk before work is perfectly acceptable when its 99 cent margaritas.
Hey, taking organic chemistry means no one is allowed to tell you you're partying too hard.
I do remember that in my dream I wasn't impressed with his dick.
I am available for nakedness
I will be wearing a suit out more cuz it has been decided i rage harder with a power tie
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