At an apparent methhead hillbilly bar and was smiling for a pic when one toothless wonder screamed "look at all them teeth"!
I let some guy put hot sauce in my asshole for his birthday
Yeah but if I do that, I'd have to buy my own stomach pump for the house. That doesn't seem like a great thing to have sitting on the coffee table.
Dude, just paid my sister in vicodin to go out and buy me a slushie.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Kinda felt bad though cuz she whimpered and shuttered a lot, i felt like i was kicking a puppy, only the puppy liked it and came a bunch
Just saw a motorized bathtub. I think this college thing is gonna work out.
Dedication to a hook up: I had to recruit five people at the train station to help me buy a ticket from a kiosk and get on the right train in 15 minutes because I discovered that my car was stolen.
i was giving head the other day and thought of your all penis tastes the same quote and couldnt stop laughing
It's gotten so bad I typed my will out on my phone in case it's over.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We took her out for fresh air and next thing we knew, she was stumbling around the backyard picking dead leaves up off the ground and putting them in her shirt to "save them".
I woke up and sent him a text that said 'I'm sorry forever'
The exact people you expect to find at a bar at 2pm are here. Come visit. We'd really like the company.
I have the WORST hangover. Pretty sure my liver fell out while taking a dump. THAT bad.
that lady just saw me taking a picture of her baby... It's time to leave.
fucking him is like fucking old faithful. you could set your watch by his orgasms.
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