what are you wearing?
Just my guilt
he told me i looked like an animal then proceeded to kiss me
the smoke from my cigarette strangely resembles what patrick swayzes ghost will look like.
we made out at a charity event. really i was helping the fight against aids...
There is a pube in my fucking eyeball
I just found like 5 packs of sparklers. If someone doesn't get set on fire tonight I am retiring from party hosting.
We can't bring brittanys dog so we are getting high and getting in my bathtub I think it's pretty safe
I am in my freshman residence hall trying to convince an Asian man to give me my pants back. Never. Drinking. Again.
Between the walk of shame, bar fight, karaoke, injuries, number of bar check-ins, and variety/quantity of alcohols and Advil consumed, I'd say HookerFest 2012 was a raging success.
Found my other fake eyelash. In a condom wrapper...
You are so lucky you didn't go back to Tate's house. They decided to figure out who had the biggest balls... I was the judge
I'm pretty sure i doubled the number of dicks I've ever touched, last night.
I'd call the fact I ended up in my own bed a huge success
Fast is cars. Home is I now. Drunk yoda me is.
had to remind myself that killing him is not a good career move AGAIN.
Randomize
