I smelled like jager and penis. The only cure was a pack of camels and plan b.
No shame. Just smoked a bowl with a Norwegian. Feels like something to cross off a list.
win or lose for butler, i'm still masturbating to brad stevens tonight
I'm listening to bach and watching porn,is that a sign of depression?
Quite the contrary. Sophistication.
Sucks about the cops last night
to be honest when I first looked up I wanted to know who was coming from a costume party..
I made a drinking game out of watching your DUI video, everytime you say " okay, well thats just your opinion"
in the past 3 nights i've fucked a millionaire, a drug dealer and a civil engineer... i dont really have a "type" anymore
I remember your 21st ending with me driving you home while you insisted making bicycle signals out the car window.
I was trying to sing daddy wasnt there from austin powers but apparently I was crying and and yelling jibberish...I get to into this shit
Wors thing about having a cop dad: random drug testing
I had to rub one out before the Shabbat dinner in case I find a nice Jewish girl to fuck me in the bathroom.
Your mother would be so proud
I'm a drunk white girl and my ancestors were drunk white girls, if we apologized our species would be extinct.
That would be a mascot riding an ATV at a semi-professional hockey game, if that doesn't sum up how I've been I don't know what could
I mean I've only met the girl once and she was trying to slit some guys tires.
I'm now forever going to blame miss frizzle for making me the sexual deviant that I am today
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