Come downstairs. Moms serving wine for breakfast again.
i decided i'll just settle for a gay guy who can manage to fuck me like the straight guys do. but here i go again, talking about my dream man.
if by "adventure" you actually mean "getting ridiculously high and shaving our legs," then yes.
Really, thanks for buying me caribou, it helped me out. Today will forever be the day I threw up in a caribou cup in the skyway outside of chipotle.
The bouncer was being really rude for no reason. Steph PICKED him up and physically MOVED him from our path on the way out.
Well thats the pro of going out drinking with a pro body builder. Even if its a girl.
You would ignore him even if it wasn't NoManUary. It could be the Winter of a Thousand Dicks and you wouldn't talk to that guy.
The Winter of A Thousand Dicks sounds terrifying!!!
Is it weird to say that getting an std with you was kinda romantic?
So the old dude that tried to fight me is definitely Katie's dad. And the pot cookie's kicking in. Shit is getting weird.
i feel like my tongue has its own mouth, and that mouth just bit its tongue and is clenching its teeth.
I vaguely remember Matt shouting something about "GET ON MY LEVEL!" at the bartender before he attempted to order a case of tequila from him.
direct quote from andrew "you know i can't hear when i drink whiskey"
Was so close to hoppin on it but then I realize it's not a dick and I needed to keep walking. Primal instincts.
Ooo, yeah! Thanksgiving will be a blast. Can't fuckin wait for the next round of "have you found a nice young man yet?" Followed by a lovely helping of "don't worry, there's someone out there for you."
I told him we could fuck whenever was concurrent for both of us
Who says no to sex and donuts?!
Randomize
