We learned a valuable lesson from last night. You can, in fact, order bacon on a Big Mac.
i was quietly enjoying my waffles when he came downstairs naked, kissed me on the forehead, and thanked me for the night before. i didnt even know anyone stayed over.
Well I'm just gonna sit here naked in this chair and whatever happens happens
I pulled my bra outta my purse. Covered in honey mustard. I still lack an explanation.
animal crackers drenched in taco bell mild sauce... surprisingly delightful
breakfast of champions
breakfast of stoners
Post-sex nachos deserve a song.
Douche bag was crowd surfing, sack punched him. Crowd carried him away in a ball of agony. LIFE=COMPLETE.
On the 3rd day, she mixed sangria and orange juice and saw that it was good.
We tried to hook you up with a girl but you said you'd rather fuck the large muscular black man because "At least he'd be tight". He was the bouncer, he heard you.
Laying in bed nude eating a Big Mac with a cat. It's gonna be a good year.
Xanax and cookies, it's good to be home
considering I just took 3 shots of fireball I don't think I'm coming back tonight. also the hulk just walked in crushing beer cans on his forehead
You gave me the best orgasm of my life. I'm buying you a house
All i remember from last night was that i was sitting on the toilet for a good hour eating a philly cheesesteak hotpocket... then i woke up... in my bed.
You were like a drunk and unconscious tickle me elmo.
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