you can't spend the night you always smell like dirty underwear and my roommates complain
why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
Reading in my econ of energy textbook about the US' largest oil spill from the 1990's.. guess i can't sell this one back either
So can you tell me who's underwear is on the cat?
Found you in the bushes with fireworks, a teacup and no shoes. Decided it was a bad time to wake you.
It took me 6months to figure out that he only had one testicle.
You just sat there and yelled "I JUST WANT TO RUB MY NIPPLES"
This is my first time seeing you since your lesbian experience. SO EXCITED!
He just asked me if he's allowed to flirt with me. That's how whipped he is.
sorry for laughing and taking pictures while you were having an asthma attack on st. patricks day
I feel like on the last day of finals we should run around campus dressed like Moses screaming "LET MY PEOPLE GO!!!!"
I'll start the recruiting
this is an emotional support booty call
And what in gods fuck were you drinking. It tasted like windex with a mixture of juce
I want to start a guest book for my bed room so when dudes leave they can write a review
Dude, the worst part is I can't even pretend it didn't happen because she posted a video of it on Facebook.
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