how was the sex?
he smelled like pickles and burnt hair.
well, there's that.
I'm not even planning on drinking that much tonight.. but I'm writing "emergency contact number" and your number on my hand just in case
she went to pee and i could hear her singing "Drip Drip Drop LIttle April Showers" from Bambi through the door.
win or lose for butler, i'm still masturbating to brad stevens tonight
im drinking italian dressing and watching dexter. its 230am. lets never drink on sundays again.
BAHHAHHAHHAHAHHA SOME ASS IS BIYING NE DRHBKS. DRUBK
She peed in the limo. She stood up and pulled up her dress and peed on the floor of the limo.
I hope in my next life I'm a sterile trophy wife. With a husband who showers me in wealth and gifts but can't get a hard on. Do you think my karma is good enough for that?
Gross! What the hell is that?!?
It's quite clearly a man posing erotically with multiple packages of bacon.
So after I fell off 4 times we concluded I'm not allowed to ride him anymore.
The stripper was dressed as the green lantern. Even for a geeky girls' bachelorette party it was lame ass.
What can i say, my face is nice and my body is just unreal. And my beer pouring/stealing is incredible \n
Shes yelled my World of Warcraft name when we were having sex, I think marriage is next.
I flushed a potato down the toilet so now we have to live in a hotel.
Plus he probably didn't want to be at home, alone... Jacking off on the big screen without you there to lend a helping hand. I mean, let's be honest. It's not fun if it's not a little weird.
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