Do you ever creep on the girls you have banged and wondered how their walk of shame went?
Oh shit. The kids are pole dancing on a broom. It's like I'm seeing my future offspring before my eyes.
I just remember thinking that if i ran really fast through the house, no one would notice i was naked.
I just found cold cuts in the blender. You and beefeater can no longer have unsupervised parties.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was so drunk. I apparently did a flip over the balcony using it as monkey bars. Ya I hurt a bit today
The things i do for you...I put all those condoms on a bed, complete with girl, and you sleep in the bathroom
Nothing brings people closer than bonding over tequila shots and running from campus security.
Hows cali? I thought of you as I shaved 1/4 of my legs last night.
Please, by all means, tell me what can't be helped by two stiff drinks & a blowjob?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That happens a lot to the people around me. It's like I'm radioactive but instead of cancer, you get desensitized to the word cunt
He doesn't want a full on relationship, he provides me with all the weed I can handle and gives me multiple mind blowing orgasms. He's my soul mate.
No I did a yoga dvd and hit my ex up via email for some pot in exchange for his mail.
Can I come over?
Sorry I gave up dick for lent. Hit me up on Good Friday tho
I forget how to act sober
Call me Sherlock Holmes, bitch.
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