There's a group of australian girls next to me. can't take them seriously. think they are going to turn into mr g
Wine smoothie.... Not as good as I thought it would be
I woke up on a futon with 2 stolen budwiesers in my purse, 5 extra bucks, a sucker stuck to my shoe, one sock, and a stolen copy of the zombie survival guide
please tell me this is not legit
i woke up with a shattered plate next to my head.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I thought making out with his sister would be a great way of meeting him. But it backfired.
well what is some mechanical horse racing with out blow involved
just made one giant jello shot... if i have to study on a saturday night, i'm gonna do it as drunk as possible
Until she magically finds a brain, I'm going to be a dick. Fair trade. She's a idiot, I'm an ass.
Oh god. I asked to "play his sexaphone" which I though was a super sex way to say "let me blow you". He fucking walked home at 4:30am
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Forever getting my life back together in gas station bathrooms.
Sometimes having a penis is like having a really stupid drunk best friend. You see it doing dumb shit but you're just not the one in charge.
Quick question, did I crash teeth with you when I snogged you, or did I headbutt something between the car and the bed last night?
He just kept repeating "It was like meep meep meep on my balls."
I've seen your dick too many times for both of us to be straight.
You have thirteen minutes to get here if you want to get back together. Otherwise I'm getting digits from the waitress.
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